


Broken and No Glue

by Marveljunkie



Series: 12 Days of Wincestmas 2k17 [9]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-12
Updated: 2018-01-12
Packaged: 2019-03-03 23:51:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13352115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marveljunkie/pseuds/Marveljunkie
Summary: Dean mourns his baby brother.





	Broken and No Glue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [doctor__idiot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/doctor__idiot/gifts).



> No Sam is not dead. Just gone. but so thoroughly gone it almost feels like he's dead.

Cruel and cold like winds on the sea  
Will you ever return to me  
Hear my voice sing with the tide  
Our love will never die 

Play the song we sang long ago  
And wherever the storm may blow  
You will find the key to my heart   
We'll never be apart 

Wild and strong  
You can't be contained  
Never bound nor ever chained   
Wounds you caused will never mend  
And you will never end  
(To the Davy Jones theme lyrics by Fialeja Youtube)

It's been a year since Sam left. Or the Stanford incident, as Dean refers to it. 

A year since Sam left him. 

He scrubs roughly at his eyes and pours himself a generous tumblr of whiskey. Sammy... His only true love. If he were to tell anyone, Dean knows they wouldn't believe him. They'd just chalk it up to extremes codependency and say it was because he and Sam were isolated and raised in such close quarters. 

It's not to say that sort of crap didn't play into this, but it's not the only reason. Dean knows he isn't that old, but he's been around more than most people, and he knows a thing or two. 

One thing he's certain of: related or not, monsters or not, he and Sam would have found their way to each other. 

The connection is too powerful, to unique to be anything less than fate. 

Dean would never have given it up. 

But Sam made that choice for both of them, and walked away, carrying deans shattered heart with him. 

Stupid kid, Dean thinks fondly. Probably didn't even know what he was doing. Just thought he could waltz away without hurting anyone. 

Dean lets out a bitter laugh and downs his whiskey. "Too fucking late for that, baby boy." He mumbles to himself. "We were already in too deep." 

He pours himself another drink. He so desperately wants to believe that he and Sam will find their way back to each other again... Wants to believe it so badly. 

"But let's face it. I obviously didn't mean as much to Sam as he did to me." 

"So now I will be alone the rest of my life because--" his throat goes tight and he can't finish the thought out loud. 

Because I will never love again, like I love Sam. 

Dean can't even bring himself to get angry. All he can do is sit there and drink, silent tears rolling down his cheeks. 

And on the other side of the country, a certain long haired boy buries his face in his pillow and mourns all he lost.


End file.
